Tuesday

Morgan is feeling much better today. She managed to cut down on her anti nausea meds and is coping well. We spent the morning baking together and she took it easy this afternoon.

Monday

Another tough day today. Morgan was nauseous all day today. She rested for the most part of the day. Her brother Max has a bit of a cold right now so we need to be extra vigilant about hand washing and making sure not to spread germs. Hopefully she can avoid the cold.

September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month- My take on that....

I used to be that person that would see a child with a serious illness or injury and I would have the urge to turn away. Not that I didn't have compassion. Selfishly, I would turn away because my heart just couldn't handle seeing them suffer. I would just refuse to even imagine what they where going through. What their parents must be going through. I couldn't bare to face the thought of it. Let alone thinking of my own children going through something like that.  I just didn't have the heart. I couldn't handle it. Not even a bit.

I can't turn away now. It is my child who people may look away from. It is my child who people may think to themselves that they can't bare to imagine what she is going through. At what her parents must be going through. It is surreal. It is hard.

I can't even begin to explain what this is like to anyone on the outside of this bubble of childhood cancer. Only those who have been through it or are going through it can truly understand.

How hard it is to watch your perfect, beautiful, polite, straight A student, the daughter that you love more than life itself go through something as heinous as this. The multiple surgeries causing scarring all over her body. The chemotherapy that gets funneled into her body through a port in her chest week after week. The nurses that come into her hospital room in full protective masks, gloves and gowns to administer this cancer curing poison. The heaps of medications she has to take daily. The pain she has had to endure. The anger. The stress. The constant worry. There is just so much. I am numb to it all now.

To have the hospital become your second home. The constant feeling of exhaustion that never goes away. Seeing so many other children in the hospital who are going through treatments and having to watch them and even sometimes listen to them through the walls of our hospital room suffering as well. To see the pain in their parents eyes that you relate to all too well.

I can tell you that I have learned a lot and as crazy as it sounds I am greatful for this experience. It has made me a stronger person. It has opened my eyes. I have learned so much. I have educated myself on a topic that had always scared me to merely think of in the past.

I have learned how incredibly strong my daughter is. She has been through so much and she just keeps fighting. Her strength is admirable. I have learned what amazing lifelong friends and family I have. They have really stepped up throughout all of this and supported me beyond belief. I love them all so much and don't think I would have my sanity without their ongoing support. I have learned how a community can come together, rally and support a family in need. There really are good people in this world.

I have learned how strong and brave all of these little cancer warriors really are. How positive they are. How even though they are going through tremendous pain both physically and emotionally, they still laugh, play and have enjoyment in every day. I have learned how much of a gem the oncology unit is at BC Children's Hospital as well as all of the staff and the hospital itself. We are so blessed to have them so close to us.

I have learned how aggressive and scary Ewing's Sarcoma can be. How blessed we are that they caught it so early with Morgan. I have learned how common all childhood cancer really is. That is frightening. I have learned that in Canada, only 3% of cancer research funding goes to pediatric cancer. 3%!!! I find this astounding.

You don't think about your child getting a life threatening illness. You just don't. I didn't. Our lives have been changed forever. There will never come a day that I will be able to breathe a sigh of relief knowing that my daughter is completely healthy. Ever again. Every little headache or growing pain or cold. We will worry. Anxiously awaiting annual scans and test results for the rest of her life. There will always be worry. There will always be the looming threat that the cancer could someday return. She may also face many other health related roadblocks in her life because of the treatment that helped to cure her of her cancer.

September is childhood cancer awareness month. Our story, sadly enough, is one of the more positive ones. Morgan's treatment thus far has gone incredibly well. The best possible outcome so far. We are so unbelievably fortunate. Many other children face far more legnthy and challenging treatments. Some spend years in treatment. Some have to travel far and wide having to split up their families, pay tremendous amounts of money for treatments and housing for months on end just to get the tests, scans, radiation, chemotherapy and medical attention that they so desperately need to survive this vicious disease.

More needs to be done to help prevent and also cure childhood cancer. More awareness needs to be brought to this cause. I, like many people was unaware and not educated in the matter. It is not fair. It is hard to see these young innocent babies and children suffer like this. Please take a moment to pray, think positive thoughts for all of these poor children and families that are currently suffering or have been touched by childhood cancer. Maybe even do your own research into childhood cancer or place a donation to Canadian Childhood Cancer Foundation or BC Children's Hospital. Or donate blood.

I am incredibly greatful for all that I have learned and plan to help support this cause and spread the word. If you made it through my ramble, thank you. I appreciate you taking the time out of your busy life. Much love to you all 💗

Sunday- She's home!

Morgan came home this morning. She is feeling very nauseous and was sick on the drive home. She got home, cleaned up and headed to bed. Quiet day for her today.

Day 5 (Saturday)

Morgan is still feeling quite nauseous but she was able to eat. Quiet day again today. She is looking forward to coming home tomorrow. Her chemo finishes up tonight and then she has post hydration until the morning. She should be ready to come home in the morning once the doctors make their rounds.

Day 4 (Friday)

More of the same today. Morgan is still batteling with nausea. Mood is still low. Trying to sleep as much as she can to pass the time.

Day 3 (Thursday)

Morgan felt nauseous all day again today. It was a pretty quiet day for her. She slept quite a bit.

Day 2 (Wednesday)

Morgan battled with nausea again all day today. She slept quite a bit today and managed to eat some soup. She met with our social worker to discuss her feelings and help improve her mood. The social worker will be coming to visit her daily while she is in treatment this week which is great. Hopefully that will help boost her spirits as they are fairly low right now.

Day 1 (Tuesday)

Morgan started her chemo today. She is doing okay. She is feeling extremely nauseous today and her spirits are low. Hopefully she will feel a bit better tomorrow.

Monday

Morgan went in first thing to get her blood work done this morning. It all came back great as expected and she will start her chemotherapy tomorrow morning.

This afternoon she met with the plastic surgeon. He is pleased with how well everything is healing and her range of motion. We will meet with him again in 4 weeks.

Sunday

Morgan had a good day today. She is feeling much better the past few days and did not need any pain medication again today.

Tomorrow morning she will be going in to Delta Hospital to get her blood work done in preparation for chemo which starts back up Tuesday morning. We start back up on the 5 day chemo.

Also, tomorrow we will be meeting with the plastic surgeon for a follow up appointment in the afternoon.

Saturday

Morgan had another quiet day today. She is feeling much better and has not needed any pain medication today.

Friday

Another good day. Morgan was feeling great today. She is healing nicely. We took her out for lunch today locally which she quite enjoyed.

Thursday

Morgan was feeling quite a bit better today. She did not need pain medication until the evening, which is great. She still has trouble over night with finding a comfortable way to sleep and tends to wake up a lot. Overall though, she is feeling much better.

Paintings

Morgan has started painting canvases the past few days. Here is what she has done so far.

Wednesday

Morgan is slowly feeling better each day. She had a good day today. She managed to make it out for dinner and to a movie with friends.

Tuesday

Morgan had a great day today. She woke up well rested at the hotel and we headed to the Vancouver Aquarium. We spent a few hours there, went for lunch and then headed home. She rested for the rest of the day.

We got word today that Morgan will meet with her plastic surgeon for a follow up appointment on Monday and will start her 5 day chemo on Tuesday.

Monday

Morgan had a great day today. We had a mother daughter afternoon evening out. We spent the afternoon downtown walking around and are spending the night in a hotel downtown Vancouver.

This is something Morgan and I do anually and we figured we may as well take advantage of her good immune health while we can before she starts back up on chemo.

She had a good time but tired quickly and ended up falling asleep fairly early tonight.

 

Sunday

Another quiet day. Morgan battled with pain in and off but she did okay.

We managed to get out today to see her dance studio put on a performance of The Lion King. It was fantastic! It was really nice to do something as a family of four again. We are really savoring this time we have right now before Morgan has to head back in for chemo.

Saturday

Morgan had a quiet day today. She is still feeling uncomfortable and in quite a bit of pain, but she is doing well. She spent the day watching tv and relaxing. Each day she feels a little bit better.

Friday

Morgan was feeling much better today and she was looking forward to coming home.

After meeting with the doctors and going over recovery at home, she left the hospital just before lunchtime. She then stopped in at Children's to drop off some paperwork and ended up meeting with her oncologist while she was there.

The doctor was very pleased with how well everything went and they discussed when Morgan should start her chemo again. We thought she would have a few weeks off to recover after the surgery but it turns out, she may be starting her chemo again this Thursday.

Even though the tumor was removed and she has tested clean in that area for cancer, she will still need to complete her chemotherapy regimen. The reason for that is ewings sarcoma is one of the most aggressive forms of childhood cancer. There is still the potential that microscopic undetectable bits of cancer are still floating around in her body. Studies have shown that surgery alone would not eradicate the cancer completely. It would just return either in the same spot or somewhere else in her body and most likely metastisize. The chemotherapy will further blast her body to kill off any and all bits of cancer left in her body and therefore, hopefully prevent it from spreading at this point and hopefully prevent it from ever returning in the future.

Thursday

Good day today. Morgan is up and moving around a lot more today. She is still in pain and that will of course, take time, but she is feeling much better.

They removed her drainage tubes from her back this morning. It was quite a painful procedure and she is happy it is over and done with. She has been taken off of iv fluids and was told that she will be able to come home tomorrow. We were so pleased to hear that.

This afternoon we got the most amazing news. The results of the pathology from the bones and tumor removed. The tumor removed was completely dead already! Which in turn means that there is no live cancer remaining in her at this point. This means that she will not need radiation!

We are so relieved and overjoyed as having radiation would mean further risks of cancer and illness in the future.  The surgeon said that the tissue surrounding the tumor was cancer free as well. This is all great news and we are so happy.

Now Morgan will take the time she needs to heal while being monitored by her oncology team. Then, when they feel she is strong enough, they will continue with the chemotherapy regimen. If all goes well, Morgan could be done her treatment as early as December. Today was a good day for us all.

Wednesday

Morgan's day today was a little bit brighter thankfully. She managed to take a few laps around the ward and was able to sit up in a chair for a while today. She is still batteling with the pain but every day it seems to be getting a little bit easier.

We are hopeful that she may be able to come home either this weekend or early next week. She has definitely made some great progress this week and her spirits although still fairly low, are improving daily.

Tuesday

Another challenging day. Morgan is tired of being in pain. She is struggling with staying positive but, looking forward to feeling better and going home.

She was able to get up today and take a few steps around her hospital room. She then sat in a chair for half an hour. Every day she feels a tiny bit better.

Monday

Another tough day. The pain came in waves today as did Morgan's mood. This has definitely been the toughest and most raw part of cancer so far. It is so hard to watch a child go through this. It is just not fair.

Morgan managed to stand up today and walk over to the window and sit down to enjoy the view. It was short lived before the pain took over and she was back in bed.

She had a visit from her oncology doctor and her personal nurse from children's hospital today. It was nice to see a familiar face at VGH. They were pleased with Morgan's progress and hopefull she will start feeling better soon. Hopfully Morgan will get the rest she needs and continue to feel a tiny bit better each day.

Sunday

Morgan had a very difficult day today. She was in a tremendous amount of pain all day and couldn't get comfortable at all. Pain medications just were not cutting it at all. She was pretty miserable.

The physiotherapist did manage to get her to stand up, which is great progress for her.

Hopefully tomorrow We can get the pain under control. It is really hard to watch her in so much pain.

Saturday

Morgan struggled again today with pain. She was able to sit up a bit today with help from the physiotherapist with a little less pain than yesterday. Tomorrow they are hopefull she will be able to stand. Baby steps. They changed the large bandage on her back today and said everything was looking good. She has two drain tubes coming out of her back and they seem to be draining less fluid today which is also positive.

She managed to eat a tiny bit today. She had some soup and juice.

Tomorrow is a new day...

Friday

Morgan had a difficult day today. She was in a lot if pain all day and her spirits where quite low for most of the day.

We had numerous visits from multiple thoracic surgeons as well as plastic surgeons throughout the day. Her shoulder and back are both healing well so far and the doctors were all quite pleased with how well the procedure went.

It will take some time I'm sure, before Morgan starts to feel better. Hopefully each day that passes, she will feel a little bit better. VGH, the doctors, and nurses have been so accomidating to us and have made us feel quite welcome here. Morgan ended up getting another room with a beautiful view.

Thursday

Thank you all so much for your love and support. It uplifted us all today and helped us get through.

The surgery went well! The thoracic surgeon removed most of her collarbone a part of her sternum and part of her top rib. Then the plastic surgeon took muscle and skin from her back to help fill in where the collar bone was and to help with function.

The surgery was about 5 hours all together which was a lot shorter than we had antisipated. We are all unbelievably happy and relived it went so well.

The tumor that was removed will now go to pathology to be tested to see if all of the cancer cells were removed from Morgan's body. They will decide from there if Morgan will need radiation treatment alongside with her additional chemo treatment once she has recovered from the surgery.

Wednesday

Morgan had a busy day today. We were at Children's first thing this morning to access her port for her surgery tomorrow and also do some bloodwork. We then headed over to VGH and Morgan was admitted. She met with a few doctors and the anestitist this afternoon and then rested for the rest of the day. She is extremely anxious and nervous for the surgery tomorrow but, is looking forward to it being over.

She was given a room in the 12th floor with a BEAUTIFUL view. We have been looking out at it all day. This evening we even got to see the ambulance helicopter land below her window and watch a gorgeous sunset.

Tuesday

Morgan had a good day today. She went to watch a matinee movie today and then rested for the rest of the day.

Tomorrow morning we will be heading to Children's to get her port accessed in preparation for the surgery. She will then be heading over to VGH to be admitted to the hospital. We will be meeting with the anestitist for her 2 hour appointment and then will be spending the night at the hospital in preparation for the surgery first thing Thursday morning.

Monday

Morgan had a quiet day at home today. She went to Delta Hospital to get her bloodwork done. We got the results this afternoon and her counts are looking good.

Sunday

Another quiet day for Morgan today. Not much to report. She will be going for bloodwork tomorrow morning at Delta Hospital to check her counts.